Cuffing season in open relationships requires the same skills that make ethical non-monogamy work year-round: clear communication, emotional honesty, flexibility, and respect for everyone's needs and boundaries.
As temperatures drop and the holidays approach, there's a shift in the air—cuffing season is here. That annual phenomenon where everyone suddenly craves commitment and cozy nights in. But what happens when you're in an open relationship? How do you navigate this seasonal pull toward exclusivity while honoring your chosen relationship structure?
Cuffing season (October through March) is driven by biological instincts for warmth, social pressure from holiday gatherings, and seasonal mood shifts from reduced sunlight. For those in open relationships, this can create unexpected tension. Partners who thrive on independence might suddenly want more time together. New connections might push for escalation. The cultural narrative of "settling down" gets louder.
Mismatched Expectations: One partner wants cozy nights in; another sees it as just marketing hype.
Scheduling Conflicts: Who gets Thanksgiving? New Year's Eve? Multiple partners mean multiplied complexity.
Emotional Intensity: Jealousy flares when a partner chooses someone else for holiday events. Feelings of being "secondary" intensify.
External Pressure: Family questions, coupled-up friends, and romantic holiday marketing create pressure to conform.
1. Communicate Early
Have conversations in early fall about:
- How each partner feels about the seasonal shift
- Changes in availability or emotional needs
- Holiday plans and expectations
- Boundaries around new connections
Conversation starter: "Cuffing season affects people differently. How do you typically feel during winter months? Any needs we should discuss?"
2. Acknowledge Seasonal Needs
It's okay to want more closeness during winter. It's equally okay not to. Create space for honest sharing without judgment.
As temperatures drop and the holidays approach, there's a shift in the air—cuffing season is here. That annual phenomenon where everyone suddenly craves commitment and cozy nights in. But what happens when you're in an open relationship? How do you navigate this seasonal pull toward exclusivity while honoring your chosen relationship structure?
Cuffing season (October through March) is driven by biological instincts for warmth, social pressure from holiday gatherings, and seasonal mood shifts from reduced sunlight. For those in open relationships, this can create unexpected tension. Partners who thrive on independence might suddenly want more time together. New connections might push for escalation. The cultural narrative of "settling down" gets louder.
Mismatched Expectations: One partner wants cozy nights in; another sees it as just marketing hype.
Scheduling Conflicts: Who gets Thanksgiving? New Year's Eve? Multiple partners mean multiplied complexity.
Emotional Intensity: Jealousy flares when a partner chooses someone else for holiday events. Feelings of being "secondary" intensify.
External Pressure: Family questions, coupled-up friends, and romantic holiday marketing create pressure to conform.
1. Communicate Early
Have conversations in early fall about:
- How each partner feels about the seasonal shift
- Changes in availability or emotional needs
- Holiday plans and expectations
- Boundaries around new connections
Conversation starter: "Cuffing season affects people differently. How do you typically feel during winter months? Any needs we should discuss?"
2. Acknowledge Seasonal Needs
It's okay to want more closeness during winter. It's equally okay not to. Create space for honest sharing without judgment.
Sexual health and performance specialist focusing on the intersection of physiological vitality and lived experience. Tracy Daly provides a knowledgeable, shame-free space for the LGBTQIA+ community and those in CNM/ENM relationship structures, advocating for sexual agency through behavior change and radical inclusivity.